After, she lay down on the bed like a weary traveler arriving home after a long journey.
i managed to move from the furthest corner of the bed to be closer, daring to touch her with only one finger.
Softly, i asked if she was still angry with me but was silenced with a firm, “hush girl.”
She had taken me by surprise Sunday morning, when i went into the bedroom to dress and go grocery shopping. Sir Raven told me mildly that she intended to see how the new arrangement in the bedroom worked, wanting to check her room to swing now that the furniture is arranged differently. Thinking little of it, thinking she would merely try out a few canes lightly, i lay down on the bed in just my panties to wait.
i had been expecting only something light and didn’t even bother to remove my glasses.
Quickly, i understood that her mild tone belied her true intent. Cane after cane, whips, and the dreaded twisted rubber whip each found their mark. Back and forth, she went through most of her collection, the only constant was the return to the braided rubber tool. At some point, i became aware of hearing the whimpering sounds of a wounded animal.
i was surprised to slowly recognize the sounds were coming from me.
She did not speak, only grabbed my ankle and pulled me across the bed back to her and made her next choices, her next marks.
i plead without abandon, finally finding words of apology, and then i would hear the whimpering noises again, the sounds reserved for wounded animals.
Something broke just then.
And i no longer cared if she ever stopped.
i stopped trying to protect my head, stopped my vain attempts to move away.
The sounds were the only constant, the lashing sounds, the flesh no longer able to distinguish anything save the unique pain of the rubber.
Peace finally came down like a fresh, light rain of early Spring.
The canes hit with less anger though no less force and i was relaxed, having let go into the peace. Content. Calm. My anger was washed away and my fear buried low. Her strap was in plain view and she had told me that she may well use it the night before. Maybe that is what she was deciding this whole time, right before the warmth returned.
Drunken peace watched as the room became suddenly bathed in muted light.
We lay down in the bed, our journey together secure.
We are bound together in the sacred light, once again.