1. Sir Raven and i were able to laugh at the Horrible, Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Summer of 2014. i said if i ever ran away again, i’d be running up her tab at the Plaza.
2. The weather has finally become Spring-like.
3. i’m beading between four and six hours per day to make the May 30th deadline. In due time, the hand beading will be a part of gifts of dream catchers for the Elders in her Spiritual Family.
4. i’ve discovered that a fucking machine exists. i asked Santa for one. i’ve been a good girl this year. i may be asking for real diamond earrings or a pony next. Who knows?
5. My school finally (finally!) approved my appeal and i return to classes June 1.
6. Sir Raven and i had a forthright discussion about how i will need a really short leash while i get back to school. She agreed, even if that means the strap. That is better than not making an A.
1. The MRI results reveals that i have a lot of back damage and one of the herneated disks is pushing into my spinal cord and may require surgery. We see the doctor on May 4th. Sir Raven has already told me that i will be having the surgery if it is recommended.
2.i’m feeling somewhat emo about this. The damage is the result of abuse and the car wreck that my brother caused deliberately and could have killed all of us.
3. i feel like i need to cry it out and wish she would do that with me. And then i feel like a bitch for needing her because it seems to not be a priority. Therefore, it shouldn’t be on my priority list.
2. Sir Raven spent a while beating me on Sunday. It had been such a long time and keeps being such a long time that i don’t know when we will ever make it back to the blood, snot, and tears that we do so damn well. My sense is we both need it. Frankly, i’ve offered she just use the strap and fuck me, as that is the fastest path to get over the edge and she loves it. We’ll see. i’m becoming more interested in just getting the trapped and strangled emotions out.