Why The Chrysanthemum and the Sword

This blog is a journey of a a power dynamic relationship. Many relationships on some level work on the premise. Ours is one of a consensual non-consensual nature. If you are looking to know more and are  interested in this kind of dynamic see the link page. also see the good reads page for books that might help you on your journey.

So why The Chrysanthemum and the Sword?  It is the title of a book written by Ruth Benedict in 1946. it was written for the US government in an attempt to help the powers that be understand  the differences between Asian cultures and Western cultures. If this subject interests you please research it.

What interested us about the book was the concept of a guilt culture and a shame culture.

“…While shame typically involves being negatively evaluated by others (real or imagined). Guilt typically involves being negatively evaluated by oneself.”

“ ..people experience shame and guilt when they have violated standards or norms.” –(Cultural models of shame and guilt p.210-211 Ying Wong and Jeanne Tsai)

To this end we’ve experienced both shame and guilt which affected how we experienced life growing up. And I’m sure that other have as well. But there came a time when one has to work on and accept what they like and how one wanted to live in order to have a fulfilled life. It’s also became important to keep an eye out on both of these (shame and guilt). Those who want to experience this life together would do well to work on doing the same. This kind of life is not easy and takes a lot of internal as well as external work. It’s a continuous journey. Because of an interest in other cultural concepts there maybe times when it is incorporated in what is being written and how it applies to our journey. I’m sure it’s really hot to think that the master slave dynamic is all about the slave kneeling and being chained to the bed while having hot sex with the master. (see the book list page).  This blog is about what interest us as people, the things that happen in life, the every day.

Here’s hoping you find your way with out shame or guilt.

The Sword


4 thoughts on “Why The Chrysanthemum and the Sword

  1. leigh12e says:

    Very challenging thoughts. Enjoy the journey.

  2. Yingtai says:

    I love that book to pieces! And I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks that facing shame and guilt is fundamental for us. I have wondered whether I should have named my blog Devil on my Back – so many of my posts are tagged that way.

    Thank you for pointing me to this blog. I think I’m going to learn a lot here.

  3. Just found your blog and this post. I will be reading this book by tomorrow. Thank you.

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